I am having one of those moments. You know, the moment you realized that you should have appreciated it more. You should have lived more. You should have done more in those moments that were so fleeting. And now you sit here wanting it all back and you feel powerless.
I had one of those moments today. I have been having those moments for a couple of weeks, actually. A lot of people that I love have graduated, got married, are having children and as these milestones are flying by for them I have been feeling stuck. It's not that I want all these things right now, but I can't help but think that I should have graduated. I should be moving on. I should have done more then so I could be where I saw myself being now. Instead I sit and reminisce about the past and do nothing to change the future.
That stops now. I have never been a small-time dreamer. I have never been one of those people that didn't know what they wanted. Now I'm being faced with change and I want to pull the e-brake and just stop time, go back, and do it differently.
What I have realized though is that life doesn't work like that. There is only one thing that can be controlled and that is the now. There is this great quote that I love. "The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others." Some say it was an idea that belonged to Ghandi, some say a Chinese prophet, and others say its author is unknown.
I found it in a fortune cookie five years ago and it is more true now than it has ever been. So I am going to start living and stop worrying so much about the past and the future. There are some great things around me right now that I just need to open my eyes to see.
I suggest you do the same.
SD
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